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How to Involve Grandchildren in Caregiving – By Guest Blogger, Isabel Tom

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If you’re tired, burned out, and looking for more support, don’t underestimate the value of grandchildren.

Growing up, my family and my paternal grandparents lived under one roof. As my grandparents aged, my parents became caregivers and they wisely involved my sisters and I to assume that role as well.

If it takes a village to raise a child, a village is just as important when caring for an older adult. In my grandma’s last month, our “village” surrounded her. Adult children made her food, grandchildren googled options for better care, and great grandchildren provided entertainment, hugs, and good cheer. Teaming together, we were able to offer my grandma better care.

If there are grandchildren around, know that with prompting and teaching, they can brighten the life of an aging adult and help lighten the load of caregiving. Here are some thoughts on involving grandchildren young and old:

1. Encourage short visits – It may be hard to encourage a grandchild, especially those who are not close to their grandparent to make lengthy visits, but encourage short visits letting children know that even a short amount of time can mean a lot. If you have young children, a plethora of artwork flows in from school. Have your child save one “masterpiece” to bring to their grandparent each visit. When you visit, have the child explain the piece to their grandparent and have them tape it on the wall.

2. Remind them to make one minute calls – Just as you remind your children to do their homework or practice piano, remind them to call their grandparents. In doing so, children at any age learn that academics are just as important as caring for others. If a grandchild is in middle school to college, encourage them to call their grandparents just to say hello. This habit can grow compassion in grandchildren as their simple gestures can improve the emotional health of their grandparent. The acknowledgement from a grandchild can be magical.

3. 5 second hugs/love taps – If the attention span of a young grandchild is particularly short, don’t worry. At the beginning and end of every visit to their great grandma, I prompted my children (all 5 years old and under) to give their great grandma a “love tap,” just to let her know we were there. Affection given by all members of the family can spark the best of moods, especially when vision and hearing becomes an issue.

4. Just ask – If grandchildren are older and able to drive, get in the habit of asking them to help bring their grandparent to the store or even doctor’s appointment, if appropriate. While a child/parent relationship can often be filled with emotional baggage, there is often less baggage in the grandparent/grandchild relationship. Having responsible grandchildren help with certain tasks can lighten the load you carry as the primary caregiver.

Having grown up in an intergenerational household, Isabel Tom has 30+ years of experience with seniors, both personally and professionally. She has worked in senior living doing operations, senior fitness and community outreach & education. Currently she manages community education and outreach at a nonprofit hospice. Isabel holds a Master’s degree in Public Health from the University of Maryland. In addition to being a wife and mother of three little ones, she loves to blog at www.aboutbeingold.com.

What Party Planning Can Teach Us About Caregiving – By Jennifer L. FitzPatrick

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Most caregivers are reluctant to ask for help from others.  Many don’t want to burden family or friends.  Others just don’t like asking for help.  Some caregivers even believe that nobody else is qualified to help.  But building a team of caregivers is crucial, not just for avoiding burnout but also to give your loved one the best quality of life possible.  Who are you excluding from the caregiving experience?

Check out Jen’s story about what we can learn about caregiver support from planning a baby shower:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=da-mFVZUB9g

Jennifer L. FitzPatrick – MSW, LCSW-C, CSP
The founder of Jenerations Health Education, Inc., Jennifer FitzPatrick has over 20 years’ experience in healthcare and gerontology. The author of Cruising Through Caregiving: Reducing The Stress of Caring For Your Loved One, she is also a gerontology instructor at Johns Hopkins University and an Education Consultant to the Alzheimer’s Association. She helps you reduce stress and increase productivity, morale and revenue. Jennifer and Cruising Through Caregiving have been featured in Forbes, U.S. News & World Report, The Huffington Post, Reader’s Digest, Univision and The Chicago Tribune. She has also appeared on ABC and Sirius XM.

How Reframing The Way You Look At Caregiving Can Reduce Your Stress – By Jennifer L. FitzPatrick

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Most people who are caregiving for a loved one feel like they don’t have a choice.  They made a vow when they got married to take care of their spouse in sickness and health.  They say there’s nobody else who would provide care for this person.  They would feel guilty if they didn’t serve as a caregiver.  But what if you looked at caregiving as a choice you are making?

Check out Jen’s latest video on how changing the way you look at caregiving can help you reduce stress:

 

Jennifer L. FitzPatrick – MSW, LCSW-C, CSP
The founder of Jenerations Health Education, Inc., Jennifer FitzPatrick has over 20 years’ experience in healthcare and gerontology. The author of Cruising Through Caregiving: Reducing The Stress of Caring For Your Loved One, she is also a gerontology instructor at Johns Hopkins University and an Education Consultant to the Alzheimer’s Association. She helps you reduce stress and increase productivity, morale and revenue. Jennifer and Cruising Through Caregiving have been featured in Forbes, U.S. News & World Report, The Huffington Post, Reader’s Digest, Univision and The Chicago Tribune. She has also appeared on ABC and Sirius XM.

How To Handle Being In Second Position – By Jennifer L. FitzPatrick

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Maybe you aren’t the primary caregiver for your loved one.  Maybe you are just “helping out” with your mother-in-law or you live at a distance from your sister who needs care.

Check out Jen’s video on how to gracefully be a secondary caregiver:   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gs8S96QCljA&t=2s

 

Jennifer L. FitzPatrick – MSW, LCSW-C, CSP
The founder of Jenerations Health Education, Inc., Jennifer FitzPatrick has over 20 years’ experience in healthcare and gerontology. The author of Cruising Through Caregiving: Reducing The Stress of Caring For Your Loved One, she is also a gerontology instructor at Johns Hopkins University and an Education Consultant to the Alzheimer’s Association. She helps you reduce stress and increase productivity, morale and revenue. Jennifer and Cruising Through Caregiving have been featured in Forbes, U.S. News & World Report, The Huffington Post, Reader’s Digest, Univision and The Chicago Tribune. She has also appeared on ABC and Sirius XM.

Should You Ever Reason With Someone Who Has Dementia? – By Jennifer L. FitzPatrick

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Most of us want to reason with someone when they don’t understand us.  We want to present our case.  Explain the facts.  Caregivers do this all the time when someone they love has dementia.  Is it ever ok?

Check out Jen’s video on this topic:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SlD4SEAbhlA&t=67s

Jennifer L. FitzPatrick – MSW, LCSW-C, CSP
The founder of Jenerations Health Education, Inc., Jennifer FitzPatrick has over 20 years’ experience in healthcare and gerontology. The author of Cruising Through Caregiving: Reducing The Stress of Caring For Your Loved One, she is also a gerontology instructor at Johns Hopkins University and an Education Consultant to the Alzheimer’s Association. She helps you reduce stress and increase productivity, morale and revenue. Jennifer and Cruising Through Caregiving have been featured in Forbes, U.S. News & World Report, The Huffington Post, Reader’s Digest, Univision and The Chicago Tribune. She has also appeared on ABC and Sirius XM.